Waiting on a Cowboy Read online

  Dedication

  For those waiting on love.

  I hope you find it.

  Perhaps it’s been right in front of you all along and all you need to do is open your heart to the possibility.

  Contents

  Cover

  Title Page

  Dedication

  Prologue

  Chapter One

  Chapter Two

  Chapter Three

  Chapter Four

  Chapter Five

  Chapter Six

  Chapter Seven

  Chapter Eight

  Chapter Nine

  Chapter Ten

  Chapter Eleven

  Chapter Twelve

  Chapter Thirteen

  Chapter Fourteen

  Chapter Fifteen

  Chapter Sixteen

  Chapter Seventeen

  Chapter Eighteen

  Chapter Nineteen

  Chapter Twenty

  Chapter Twenty-One

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  Chapter Twenty-Six

  Chapter Twenty-Seven

  Chapter Twenty-Eight

  Chapter Twenty-Nine

  Chapter Thirty

  Chapter Thirty-One

  Chapter Thirty-Two

  Chapter Thirty-Three

  Chapter Thirty-Four

  Chapter Thirty-Five

  Chapter Thirty-Six

  Announcement to Love of a Cowboy Chapter One

  About the Author

  By Jennifer Ryan

  Copyright

  About the Publisher

  Prologue

  Back in the day

  Kindergarten Playground

  “Hey, Lizard, I’ll trade you my grapes for one of your chocolate chip cookies.”

  “Stop calling me that.”

  Tate sat next to Liz, rolled his eyes, and stuck his tongue out at her because she told him that all the time. And he ignored her all the time.

  Liz handed over the cookie and popped one of the grapes into her mouth. She’d rather have the cookie but didn’t mind sharing with Tate—even if he did call her names. He didn’t mean it.

  He’s weird.

  But she liked him. He always picked her first to play a game, let her ride the pony at his birthday party before anyone else, and always sat with her to paint during free time and at lunch. She liked that. Daddy picked Mama to do everything with him, too.

  Tate stuffed the whole cookie in his mouth, and Liz announced, “I’m going to marry you.”

  Tate stopped chewing and stared at her. “Na-uh.”

  “Yes I am.”

  He shook his head. “Na-uh.”

  She smiled, confident she knew better. “You’ll see.”

  Chapter One

  Today

  All Grown Up

  Mostly

  Tate walked into the Backroads bar ahead of his brother Declan and spotted the woman who’d been dodging him for weeks. A you-done-me-wrong country song blasted through the overhead speakers as he closed the distance, his eyes locked on the girl he’d known since preschool but who couldn’t be bothered to call him lately. It used to be all he had to do was think about her and the phone rang. But ever since her parting “you just don’t get it” shot weeks ago, he’d heard nothing from her. And he wanted to know why.

  He wanted things to go back to the way they used to be.

  “What the hell, Lizard?”

  She turned on the stool, her head tilting to look up at him, fiery dark red hair falling over one shoulder, down her arm, and brushing the tabletop. “What do you want?” Not an ounce of welcome tinged those words or filled her annoyed green eyes.

  “I want to know why I haven’t heard from you.”

  Her head fell back with her exasperation and those green eyes that always saw everything about him narrowed. “Have you missed me?”

  The question set off an alarm in his head, but he didn’t know why. Answering her question seemed like stepping on a land mine, so he evaded it. “Why are you avoiding me?”

  “After our last conversation, I thought that’d be clear.”

  He tried to remember what they’d talked about. But the last few weeks he’d been distracted—his ex-military brother, Drake, had fallen into a dark place, but Adria helped him claw his way out, then her twin sister, Juliana, had died of an overdose. The man responsible for Juliana’s death faced off with Drake and Adria, though it didn’t end well for him, and they took Juliana’s death hard. It was a lot to deal with, and the whole thing had been traumatizing. He’d been so happy for his brother when Drake and Adria worked things out and ended up engaged. At the time, everything else in Tate’s life had faded to the background—until recently, when he woke up and realized he hadn’t seen Liz in weeks.

  “Lizard, you know I’ve been helping Trinity and Adria get their business up and running. And the situation with Juliana turned tragic. I lost track of everything and had to focus on my family.”

  Sadness and regret filled her eyes. “That’s just it, Tate, you unloaded all that on me at the time, yet you can’t remember what I said to you.”

  He thought back and recalled the thing that stuck with him. “You told me that if things were meant to work out, Drake and Adria would make it happen. They did. They’re married and expecting and Drake’s happier than I’ve ever seen him.”

  For the first time since he walked in a soft smile tilted her lips. “I’m happy for him.”

  Of course she was. Their lives had been intertwined forever. She knew everything that happened in his life and with his family.

  “So what’s the problem?”

  “You,” she snapped. She never raised her voice to him. “And me for hoping for something that is never going to happen because you’re you.”

  He held his hands out wide, then let them fall and slap the sides of his thighs. “What the hell does that even mean?”

  Before he got an answer, some dude with dark hair and a fuck-off look in his eyes walked up and inserted himself between him and Liz.

  Tate immediately hated the guy.

  “She’s with me.”

  That’s what you think.

  Liz was his best friend and no one got in between them.

  Tate glared at the guy in the odd-for-a-honkytonk-bar tie, button-down shirt, and slacks and took a step closer. But the guy stood his ground and didn’t move out of Tate’s way.

  Liz slipped off the stool, linked her fingers with the guy’s, and leaned into him. “Clint, it’s okay. Tate’s an old friend.”

  One of Uptight Dude’s eyebrows shot up at that. Liz looked a little sheepish.

  Tate refocused on Clint. “I’m her best friend.”

  Clint’s stance relaxed even if he didn’t back down. “Ah. She told me about you.” Whatever Liz told him obviously didn’t impress the guy.

  Tate couldn’t care less. “Then you’ll excuse us while I have a word with her.”

  Liz spoke before Clint said anything. “I said what I wanted to say the last time we talked.”

  “And you haven’t said anything since,” he pointed out, his gut tight. Obviously, he’d missed something big. From the sound of things, it just might cost him the person who knew him better than anyone and who had always been there for him.

  “It’s not like you called or came to see me in the last six weeks.”

  “It hasn’t been that long.” They never went more than a few days without talking or seeing each other. Maybe it had been a couple weeks this time, but not six. Right?

  “You’re busy doing your thing. It’s time I did mine. If you’ll excuse us, we’d like to get back to our date.”


  What the fuck?

  Liz dismissed him and turned to take her seat again.

  Tate couldn’t let things go on this way. They definitely didn’t end this way. “Wait.”

  Clint put his hand on Tate’s chest to stop him from touching Liz’s shoulder.

  Tate went still and pointedly looked at that hand on him. “You want to keep it, you’ll take it back. Now.”

  They locked eyes and the energy around them became charged with animosity.

  Clint dropped his hand but still didn’t get the hell out of Tate’s way. “You didn’t want a shot with her, so I took it. Back off. She wants to be with me.”

  Like she didn’t want to be Tate’s friend anymore. What the fuck was going on?

  Tate felt Declan come up behind him before Declan’s hand settled on his shoulder. “Come on, bro, let’s get a beer and leave Liz and her date alone to enjoy their evening.”

  Tate glared at the back of Liz’s head. She sat there not saying a word. She wouldn’t even look at him.

  “We’ll talk later, Lizard.”

  Clint shook his head. “She hates that silly nickname.”

  No she didn’t. Though she’d never admit it. It had become a thing between them. It didn’t have anything to do with Clint. “What the hell do you know?”

  “From what I’ve heard, I know a hell of a lot more about her than you do.”

  Declan grabbed Tate’s arm and pulled him back a step before he decked the guy. “Let’s go.”

  Tate had known Liz practically his whole damn life. “You don’t know anything about me and Liz.”

  “I know she wants a man who appreciates her and doesn’t take her for granted.”

  Tate took a step closer, not liking Clint’s smug smile or the way he puffed up his chest.

  Liz jumped in between them and planted both hands on Tate’s shoulders and shoved him back into Declan. “Don’t you dare ruin this for me!”

  He had no idea what she meant.

  She held up her hand. “Just go.” The plea in her eyes killed him.

  His gut constricted and his heart had trouble beating against the tightness around his chest. “Liz?”

  Her lips tilted in a half frown. “Go get a beer with Declan. Flirt with the waitresses, pick up one of the dozen women staring at you right now. Do what you do and let me be.”

  That almost sounded like goodbye.

  It couldn’t be.

  But Liz turned her back on him again.

  Clint took her hand, pulled her close, then walked her to the dance floor where he took Liz in his arms and swayed to the slow song with her head resting on his shoulder.

  Declan smacked his hand on Tate’s shoulder. “It was only a matter of time.”

  Tate couldn’t take his eyes off Liz in that asshole’s arms. “What the hell are you talking about?”

  “She’s a beautiful woman. You had to know that at some point she’d want a serious relationship with someone who wants to make her his wife and have a family. He seems decent enough.”

  Tate turned on Declan. “You don’t know anything about him.”

  “He’d have to be a good guy for Liz to like him so much.”

  “How do you know she likes him?”

  “She let him step in to get you away from her.”

  She picked Clint over him.

  She never chose anyone over him.

  What the hell is going on?

  The crack about flirting with waitresses and picking up a woman hinted that she didn’t like him choosing others over her either.

  He knew that. He wasn’t blind or an idiot.

  But she was Liz. Hands off had always been his rule.

  “It’s unusual for women and men to be friends.” Declan headed for the bar.

  Tate followed. “We’ve been friends since we were finger painting and eating Play-Doh.”

  Declan took one of the open stools and held up two fingers to Tami behind the bar, who nodded she’d get them their usual. “Liz has been in love with you since then, but you can’t expect her to love you, and only you, for the rest of her life when you dismiss her feelings the way you do.”

  “What are you talking about?” Tate didn’t want to go there.

  Declan glanced over and laughed. “Oh come on, you can’t tell me that you don’t revel in the fact that she loves you and puts up with all your shit while you treat her like your favorite pet.”

  That pissed him off. “I do not.” Did he? That sinking feeling in his gut intensified.

  Declan shoved his shoulder so he’d turn in his stool. “Look at her. Do you want to strip her bare and get your hands on her?”

  “That’s Liz.” He didn’t dare think such things about her. They were friends.

  Or they used to be.

  “Exactly. How long did you expect her to wait for you to stop seeing her as pigtailed Lizzy Lizard? She’s a grown woman now, Tate, with hopes and dreams of love and marriage and a relationship that isn’t all about you.”

  “Our relationship isn’t all about me.”

  Declan laughed in his face. “Keep telling yourself that, bro, but you’re the one who has no idea what happened six weeks ago that made her take a huge step back until she fell right into Clint’s arms.”

  Fucking Clint.

  “He made her dump me.”

  Declan saluted Tami with his beer bottle in thanks for filling their order. “Dumped? Is that how it feels?”

  Kinda. But he denied, denied, denied.

  “It’s not like that. We’ve only ever been friends.”

  “And it’s been clear for years she’s wanted more.” Declan frowned. “Don’t shake your head at me. You know I’m right. Everyone can see it. She settled for friends because you mean that much to her, but you can’t expect her to settle for that for the rest of her life. You can’t expect her to watch you date other women, listen to you tell her all about how it’s going and cry on her shoulder when it doesn’t work out and think she doesn’t feel jealous and left out.”

  “She dates.”

  “And nothing ever comes of it because you’ve got her heart.” Declan took a sip of his beer. “Were you even a little happy when those relationships ended?”

  His stomach clenched. “Of course not.” As soon as the words left his mouth, he heard the lie. He’d never been jealous of her relationships. He was just happier when she was focused on him.

  I’m an asshole.

  And a terrible friend.

  He should be happy for her. He should want her to find someone special. He wanted to see her as happy as Drake and Adria looked when they were together.

  He glanced at Liz on the dance floor smiling and clapping her hands as she spun and swayed her hips in the line dance, Clint trying to keep up with her.

  He just didn’t want her happy with Clint. “Something about that guy bugs me.”

  “Mom always told us we have to share our toys.”

  Tate smacked Declan upside the head. “She’s my best friend, not a Hot Wheels.”

  “Maybe she’ll make you her maid of honor at her wedding.”

  Tate fumed and downed half his beer. “Fuck you.”

  “Nice comeback.” Declan turned and leaned back against the bar, sitting like Tate, watching Liz on the dance floor. “You ate up all her attention. Are you upset that she’s giving it to someone else or pissed that she might be falling in love with him and you want to be that guy for the rest of her life?” Declan held up his hand to stop Tate from spitting out another expletive. “Don’t answer. Think about it. Because she deserves to find someone who treats her the way she’s treated you all these years. Don’t take this chance away from her just because you want her to love you and no one else when you don’t really want her.”

  Tate slammed his beer down on the counter, stood, and walked out of the bar without looking at Declan or Liz because he didn’t know what to do with Declan’s question or how Declan’s words made him feel.

  This was Li
z. Liz! The girl who played in the rain with him and raced him on horseback and never won but always took it in stride. They double-dated to all the school dances. She warned him when one of his girlfriends did something behind his back and always consoled him after a breakup. She had no problem pointing out all his faults and where he’d gone wrong but in a humorous way that made him smile and laugh and somehow feel better despite the fact that she was probably right.

  Honest. Dependable. Smart. Kind. Generous. The list went on of all the good things he liked about her. Her sweetness drew him to her when they were kids.

  She was a part of his life. A piece of him.

  And with that thought, he went back to what Declan asked.

  Did he want to keep her from falling for some other guy just because he didn’t want to lose her as a friend?

  He wanted her to be happy. She deserved to have everything she wanted.

  What really got to him was that it wasn’t that he hadn’t ever looked at her as a woman he wanted, but that he always stopped himself from crossing that line because he didn’t want to lose what they already had together.

  But if he lost her to some other guy, would he forever wonder what might have been if he took a chance on them?

  What if he’d waited too long?

  What if she really was done with him?

  Chapter Two

  Liz caught Declan’s eye after Tate stormed out of the bar. Declan shrugged and gave her a half smile. She hated to upset Tate, but she needed some space. She couldn’t keep holding on to him. It left no room for anyone else to come into her life because she was always looking at Tate. What if she missed a good guy who wanted what she wanted because she was pining for Tate and hoping he’d miraculously love her?

  He didn’t.

  He wouldn’t.

  And it hurt to admit that and feel like no matter how hard she loved him it would never change.

  After all this time, she’d finally accepted that he’d put her in the friend zone and had no intention of moving her out of it.

  Clint hooked his hand around her middle from behind, planted it on her stomach, and leaned down close to her ear. “You came here with me. Forget him.” He nuzzled her neck and gave her a soft kiss. “You’re kind and sweet, beautiful, and sexy as hell.”